Friday, January 28, 2011

Its Still You...

Though i have found someone new
all this time, i wish it was you...

The thing is im not your type
i wish i could be the one you truly love
then i can be your angel sent from above
we may not be the one i wanted us to be
but i do believe God created you for me!
its too sad to think that you can never be mine
i wish i could just act it out like a mime...

You're owned by someone else now
my wishes shall end up with a bow
hoping that you'll always smile my way
surely you'll brighten up my day.

Loving you is all that i have done
but damn, now you're gone...

Everything should have been meant to be
until my good friend came to me...
its what your lips had said,
shit! im half dead when i heard you say "ITS TRUE".
damn baby, cause its still you...

I Never Knew How Much You Mean To ME...

My heart felt like a ship sinking to the sea
coz i let go of someone so dear to me
tears rolled down my cheeks seeing a picture of you and me
my mouth could only say your name silently

My heart aches whenever i see you with someone else
coz i remember the memories of us together
But seeing you happy with someone new
I felt devastated coz i never saw you as happy as ever

I sat on the roof, staring at the stars shining at night
i remembered the times you were with me
i smiled but tears rolled from my eyes
coz i never told you i love you dearly

I dont know what to do coz i was hurt when i lost you
you left me with a broken heart
now my dreams are shattered into pieces, i blame myself for everything!

I sat down and started to think that all these years you've been looking at me so lovingly
but the sad thing about it was that i never did see coz i never knew how much you mean to me...

When Will You Come Back

Unopened gifts... to you from me
A silent phone... waiting for your call
Closed door... hoping that you knock

An empty chair... useless without you
Unsung song... waiting for your laughter
Alone in the rain... longing for your embrace
Lonesome in the dark... wishing you were back!

When... When will you,...
open my gifts with delight,
dial the phone to give me a call,
knock and see me waiting by my door,
sit on the chair with me by the cozy fire,
sing our song as i play my guitar,
laugh at the jokes i crack,
embrace me and keep me warm in the rain,
brighten the gloomy nights as we watch the fading moonlight?

Please, please come back soon...
and make this life of mine worth living one..


A new day...

I saw him...

A new face, outshining the crowd...

I met him... it felt different...

Another day has passed...

I went home...

fell asleep...

As i wake up in the morning, i long for you badly... Your sparkly little eyes, your sweet smile that lightens my day, your soft red lips that i longed to kiss, imagining your warmth and tender hugs wrapped around me that erases my worries and slowly... makes me feel safe, contented and happy.

Am i falling inlove again? is he the one? my prince in shining armor? or is it a different thing? infatuation or maybe im just not over with my dark past and it still hurts me. i dont know! im CONFUSED... but what the hell! i have moved on... i guess... hopefully... i cant stand it anymore... i cant stand those sleepless nights, those memories that hunts me and makes me ask myself of whether it may happen again or was it our last and will just be a simple memory? i hate myself for falling so badly! was i not enough? or was i to much to handle? did i ever made you feel at ease or was i so protective? weren't you happy with me or were you too happy that scared you away, thinking that you will just hurt and disappoint me? if that's the case then.... then your SELFISH! Selfish for not telling me how you felt, i may have understood you but rather you were silent and just kept it all to yourself! But you know what? if you're selfish for doing that... i'll admittedly say that i was STUPID! so stupid for not knowing how you felt, for making you think that it was all your fault, for making you feel that you were not enough... but the truth is that... you were more than enough! you are the one i wanted to be with, the one i truly love, the one that i can never replace in my heart, the one i want to spend the rest of my life with...

Through all of this... i cant help but think that...

you are GONE... and NEVER to return...

A Suffering...

You're right, I am suffering… suffering because I can’t be with you yet, suffering to be with you. I can’t stand it anymore! I am longing to be with you every moment of everyday! This world is a very muddled place, how can they make us feel this way. Our love is near but yet so far, it’s like we love each other so much that it unifies us into one but also it tends to be far because of the hindrances of our relationship! As I said awhile ago, I’m suffering to be with you and the only thing that keeps me hanging and holding on is the fact that I know I love you and that you love me. I hope you’re doing fine with your life. Hope to see you soon. Always remember that you’re always in my heart.

Don't Give Up...

I feel your pain and it hurts me more seeing you feel this way and undergo such troublesome. But I ask you my love to hold on and furthermore may our love flourish even if it means going against everything around us. I know that our love has been in rough roads and I also know that it would not end easily; we may encounter more problems and trials as we continue our journey of loving each other. Let us not think pessimistically but rather think that these trials and bumpy roads will make our relationship stronger and our love deeper. Please don’t give up on me… don’t give up on us. I have been also feeling the same things that you feel, but I rather set them aside and just focus what we have and what we can have. I love you, your name may sound funny but it is the only name that my heart beats for.

My I Dont Knows...

i don't know if i have not been that sensitive with your feelings...

i don't know if you miss me, our talks and everything...

i don't know what keeps you irritated when i open "THAT" topic...

i don't know if you feel how much i care about you...

i don't even know if you care at all...

i don't know what i have done wrong...

i don't know why you need to let go of what we have...

i don't know what's bothering you right now...

i don't know if you still need me to listen to your problems and stories...

i don't know if you can see and feel that im hurting right now...

i don't know if you still want me to stay...

i don't know if you still want me to be part of your life...

i don't know if you will ever talk to me again...

i don't know if we'll see each other again...

i don't know if you still want me to love you...

i don't know what to do...


i do know how real and authentic my love for you is!!!

How to Enhance Relationships?

In my life, i have encountered and surpassed a lot of trials.. relationship trials specifically... with family, friends and even in love... i mean.. who doesn't diba? and i know that meron pading mga dadating na new trials sa llife relationships ko... so maybe your thinking, what the hell did i do.. haha! am i a relationship expert now? nah... uhmm.. just want to share some insights regarding enhancing relationships... okay? :D more on LOVE haha... bakit ba! hehe...

So the first thing that a person should establish in a relationship is is a very important factor in a relationship. When trust is broken, it is the end of the relationship. Lack of trust leads to suspicion, suspicion generates anger, anger causes enmity and enmity may result in separation. (Kaya to those people who keeps on questioning their partners on alot of things... pwede ba magtiwala naman kayo!)

Another thing, in a relationship make sure na there is no pointing fingers... (oops, iba nanaman iniisip niyo! kayo talaga! haha) You should never criticize your partner for their shortcomings or when they do something wrong, always bear in mind that because of their shortcomings and weaknesses, they could not find a better partner than you. We all look forward to being loved and respected. Many people are afraid of losing face. Generally, when a person makes a mistake, he would look around to find a scapegoat to point the finger at. This is the start of a war. We should always remember that when we point one finger at a person, the other four fingers are pointing at ourselves. If we forgive others, others will ignore our mistakes too. (makes sense? oo naman noh!)

Also, the existence of overpowering is a NO NO! haha... coz many relationships fail because one party tries to overpower another, or demands too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all (yah right!) and their partners will change the bad habits. Actually, this is not the case... how do i know? ask yourselves! It is not easy to change, having high expectation on changing a partners character will cause disappointment and unpleasantness. (ahuh, you got that right...) the best thing to do is change ourselves and lower our expectations... its a less painful! diba? what do you think?

Then, we should also consider choosing the right words to say at the right time and place... many relationships break off because of wrong speech... (i know i did before... haha) When a couple is too close with each other, we always forget mutual respect and courtesy. We may say anything without considering if it would hurt the other party...

Most importantly, we should also be very patient. Think first before you lose your patience with someone you love. Material things can be repaired but a hurting feelings often can't. Too often we fail to recognize the difference between the person and the performance. We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge. People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.

There you go... enhancing relationships is really important... i know a lot of people who parted ways with their partner just because of simple things that they disregarded in their relationships. (specifically those that i elaborated)..

Love is...

Love is a CONTRADICTION... you may love whoever you want to but not all of them will love you the way you do!!!

Love is a BIG RISK... you'll give your all; your heart, body and soul, you may even go against your principle but will that person be willing to sacrifice all for you?!?

Love is MELLOW DRAMATIC... it's like watching prime time "telenovelas" in television or for some, it's like reading a "Novel" and the main theme: love, hatred and betrayal! it sounds silly, but hey... who doesn't experience such bad days anyway?!

Love is CYCLICAL... it's a "Wheel of Fortune", it's not always a happy ending for everybody (breaking up-together again-breaking up) but for some... its the best thing that ever happened in their lives!!!

Love is a GAME... it's supposed to be about fairness, trust and honesty but that's not always the case! There are people who love just for the sake of playing around, it gives them thrill and excitement and even disregards your feelings! damn asses! lol!!!

But what heck?!!! Love maybe contradictory, a risk, mellow dramatic, cyclical and even a game! We just need to remember that LOVE is also what gives us the feeling of contentment wherein the scenario is... we sit and look back with our lives... thinking... feeling... that you wouldn't and couldn't ask for more!!! FOR AS LONG AS THAT PERSON IS IN YOUR PRESENCE, THAT IS WHAT MATTERS!

Im Gay

I was browsing the net one day... I saw this heart-melting piece of art, its actually not just a piece of art... its more of a PHENOMENON...while reading it, dozens and thousands of past experiences bombarded my mind, my heart and soul. Its as if I was relieving that same day, the day I fell in love and got my heart broken and torn, but despite such tribulation I was eager to stand up and prove to the world that Im GAY, hotter than your lover and yummier than your next. LOL Anyway, I'd like to share it with you guys, hope such will deeply touch your hearts...

I once loved one man, he took my only heart
and right there in front of me, he ripped it apart
I know he didn't mean to, and the fault is mine to blame
but the guilt and pain remains all the same
but now I understand, why he ran away
now I understand why he didn't stay
he was afraid to love, and afraid to take a chance
he was afraid to leave and make another stance
he was afraid to make his mark on societies wall
he was afraid to take a leap, as he could fall
he would have rather stayed inside that rotting jail
he rather stay with society, even though I paid bail
he made his mind and stayed with society
even though he had his chance to be free
so now as I sit outside societies dream
I linger like a nightmare, making people scream
they say its just a phase, that I'll get over it soon
they say its a disease, like the werewolf and the moon
but deep down in my heart, I know it isn't so
because I have to be strong, so I can show
people like the one man who threw me in a bin
that no matter how hard they try, we will never give in!
cause what's the point of hurting us? so we can feel bad?
so we can understand what its like to be sad?
well we already know just how it feels
cause it is so hard for us to reveal
that we like the same sex, and who really gives a damn?
goes in the end we all still go all cold and clam
so who cares if I'm gay! I am proud to be
because in my world I take it as a victory
that I can make a choice and stand from the rest
be an individual and try my best
and kids at school may laugh at me and call nasty names
but you know what? it doesn't matter its all a game!
cause later on in life they will suddenly see
that the reason I was gay, was because it was me
so go on a call out names and raise your heads so high
but remember who I am, just before you die
remember that I was strong and managed to pull through
and remember that if I can do it, then so can you
so today I stand and say that I am proud to be gay
and if I had a choice... I'd have it no other way!

- Told you so? I know you just had a teary eye, Am I right my friend? What can you say about it? =)

Source: I'm Gay, Teen Poems